Back to School Tips for Families Navigating Change and Uncertainty

As back-to-school season rolls in, most people are talking about supplies, routines, and first-day jitters. And sure, those things matter. But for many of the families that Sakeenah Canada supports, this time of year is about something much deeper.

As the Child and Youth Program Advisor at Sakeenah Canada, I work directly with mothers/caregivers, children, and youth in our shelters in Canada. I see what it’s like when a child is preparing to return to school while also coping with trauma, family instability, grief, or the emotional weight of recent changes. I see moms who are doing their best to hold everything together, often while trying to heal themselves, too. If that sounds like you or someone you love, I just want to say: You’re not behind. You’re not alone. And there’s nothing wrong with you or your child for finding this season hard.

Here are some gentle, practical back to school tips I often share with families in our shelters that can help support both you and your child as the school year begins:

1. Keep Things Predictable, Even in Small Ways

After trauma or disruption, children often crave predictability. Simple routines for children such as a consistent morning or bedtime, a favourite breakfast, or a quick nighttime snuggle can provide comfort and a sense of control. If possible, help your child get familiar with their school environment ahead of time through a visit, a practice run, or time on the playground. These small steps reduce anxiety and make the transition smoother.

2. Make Space for Big Feelings

It’s normal for children to feel sad, scared, or shut down during times of change. They don’t need to be “over it” to start school. Let them know it’s okay to feel whatever they’re feeling. Create gentle opportunities to talk, like during a walk or while drawing. Ask open-ended questions: “What are you feeling about going back to school?” I often recommend books to families like The Kissing Hand, which can help kids feel seen and supported.

3. Communicate with the School

If your child is going through a tough time, let the teacher or school counselor know. Even a simple note like, “We’ve had a difficult summer”, can go a long way. Schools often have student support services support systems in place, like counseling or quiet spaces. You don’t need to share every detail, just enough to help them support your child better.

4. Help Your Child Find Their “Go-To Person” at School

I often ask kids: “If you feel upset at school, who can you go to”? Sometimes it’s a favourite teacher, sometimes it’s the librarian, or even the lunchroom supervisor. Whoever it is, help them know it’s okay to go to that person when they feel off. Encourage them to ask for help or a break when they need it, and practice simple phrases like, “Can I take a break?” or “I need to talk to you.” If they don’t have a go-to person yet, that’s okay. This year could be about finding one.

5. Celebrate the Small Wins

Kids who are going through tough times may struggle to concentrate, stay organized, or manage emotions, and that’s okay. Praise the little victories: getting out of bed, going to school, asking for help. Say things like, “You were so brave today” or “I’m proud of you for trying.” Remind your child (and yourself) that progress doesn’t have to look perfect.

6. Don’t Forget Yourself

I work with a lot of moms who pour everything into their kids and have nothing left for themselves. I get it. But I also remind them: Your child needs you to be okay. Take even five minutes to rest, breathe, pray, or ask for help. Lean on support when you can from friends, family, or community resources. At Sakeenah Canada, we remind our mothers: You can’t pour from an empty cup. Taking care of yourself is part of taking care of your family.

Every day, I see how powerful love, patience, and simply being there can be for children and families. Healing doesn’t happen all at once – it happens in small, brave steps. There’s no perfect way to begin a new school year after hard times, only the way that works for you. Also moms, you’re doing better than you think. Truly. And that’s more than enough.

If you or someone you know needs support, Sakeenah Canada is here – not just to provide shelter for women and children, but to walk with you through healing, rebuilding, and finding peace again. Sakeenah offers free mental health therapy in Canada with compassionate professionals who understand your family’s unique experiences. Our Child and Youth Program, which focuses on social-emotional learning skills, safety courses, digital citizenship, and more, is designed to help children and youth build confidence, resilience, and a sense of belonging.